the nothing, pt. 1

he wound his way through the wreckage,
settling on a sight afar,
past crumbling buildings torn apart
from long-expected war.

his figure small his pace uneven
the man a shadow only
nothing stirred but canyons howling
sighing, "oh how lonely."

trudging on beyond all land
at the edge of nothing
cause nothing was all was left
the negative space, numbing.

under arching home
spaces that leave the body peace
sensitive pauses

I make plans and I make moves
I make these choices and lose the grooves
Watching her step out to the brink
These tentative spaces let me think
And so it goes that all is here
In moments she stops and waits so near
But fallen not she's just in stride
Comfortably close, by my side.

fluid rains in mental graciousness
were settled further from our legions
plaintive cries chaos rendered motionless
feel trepidation ranking all the higher.

when you fall into places and questions and phases unseen
you'll know where I've been
fleets and fleeting moments pass in stark daylight
wars of existence thrown about with absolute certainty of the sacredness
of life
and it blows by with myriad rains and floods and waves that wash into watercolors
sweet soft memories
that though I'm young
were whispers and tales that I have seen worlds crumble under the worn rubber
of my shoes
in these hours all passes by quickly.
how soon the light rises.
how soon our days begin again.
a day begins
while I sleep and hope that I'm not left too far in its wake.
sometimes I know that it all is a question of unspeakable importance
in this mind I live
this anxious heart and soul
turns and tortures itself
but blankness will do me in shortly.
so what of it?
what of
it?

If you had my answer
And you weren't satisfied
What then could we do?

If I blew away
All my so called desires
Where then would I be?

As time keeps unwinding
I unfold into less and less
Than I ever was at the start.

When you and me
Are here in these spaces
Between the lines.

I don't make statements
I only have questions.
I can't answer.

I think I know
What's in your heart
But I can't say it.

So go your way
To the end of the line
And don't look down.

I knew where
You were headed today
But I can't say it.

today's poem

presses hard and follows me into space
with nothing but this quickness of breath I fall
and through your loving embrace I am blanketed
blankets fall along with the questions of you
you
dammit I know you
and I know where you are
within all these questions I have made my decisions
they lie within my spaces
my neurons
firing squads of synapses settling into more questions
questions, always these fucking things
I think I pretend to not know when I know what I think
I don't have anything but doubts about these realities living in me
freefalling
in comfortable space sitting at this small table
staring at this screen
and I am empty within
this vessel of a universe within a greater question of god
who is it
what are you asking of me?
and if you don't ask me
then I will give you no help
I give no help
I fall with no hands beside me
I am sorry for it
I am sorry for it
for all these wandering failures through me
vapid
it's all vapid.
you know.

12/14/09

I support the status quo
In action only.

You ignorant pigs
Chewing all you're fed and shitting it back to the system
Step outside your fucking box.
And see the blackened skies
A tool until the end
I stand beside you yelling
We're in this together.
But you're watching the television
Checking the latest shit as it rolls across the screen.
Collect your drivel, your spam, your waste of life.
I can't watch this go on.
Your story is someone else's, you bought it with your Visa.
I hope the end is worth it,
Cause the journey wasn't.

12/2/2009

Rocks crawl
Melancholy souls simmer
Pages deluded by ink

November 2009

I.

I fought unknown forces
I tackled my demons unseen
Through forests of nerves and sinews
I wondered when it would end.
And you I sought through it all
A glorious vision of peace
I wrap my arms around you
Let my tension release.

I am a knight in the night
I have journeyed for days and not years
I'm seeking the roots of a quest
That plays upon all of my fears.

II.

Burn with passion
And life will alight
I said to her
It'll be alright
Don't step out your door
Until you're ready for a ride

Said she'd do as I told
Even though she was scared
I'm scared too, babe
But life needs the thrills.
So we took it together
And tore through to space

I wanted more
And I wanted you more
And more kept on coming
Still I kept on the gas.

January, no it's February

Investor
Filling orders requested
As signs dwell between past and present
I am in those spaces
Are you listening as particles collide over me?
New noises and new toys to make me known
Don't deny me my existence
In this hungry place the liberty is satisfying my cravings
Quietly I dwell
As the afternoon sun hides from warming me
But cool air can do nothing to reslice the past
Thanks to those who make me nervous
I need you plenty as I need no one else.